Sunday, July 10, 2016

I've Got Skillz

The omniscient "they" say it takes 10,000 hours of repetition to become an expert at something. That seems like a lot!  What have I done for 10,000 hours...well work probably and I am really excellent at my job (which I've actually managed to keep for a whole year now. GO ME!)  What else?  Sleep maybe?  I wish I felt like I'd ever had that much sleep--especially lately.  What on earth could I possibly be called an expert at?

Hmmmm...and there are those with so-called "natural" talents.  Those just born knowing how to do something well.  Or seemingly so..those graceful ballerinas, ice skaters, hoopsters and footballers do spend easily 10,000 hours or more at practice and repetition making what seems "natural" the result of a lot of serious hard work  Have you ever been asked a question in a job interview "what's your talent or what skills do you bring to the table?"  In a job setting it's easy to rattle off a list of work related stuff...I can type, proficient in Excel, I can stay awake when the 2 o'clock coma is settling in, and Ooh! I'm getting really good at the sternly worded email, etc.

Outside of work that question isn't so easy...for me at least.  I'd stumble and mumble through it and think to myself, "I can play a mean radio," or "I'm almost up to level 400 on Cookie Jam."   Or maybe I do have a talent, a recently discovered one that I've become really, really good at:  I AM MAN REPELLANT.  After all it takes lots and lots of talent to remain an unmarried, still single STRAIGHT woman for 44 years.  Look around.  Everyone I know personally and even here in this little blogosphere is married.  You're saying "well not necessarily happily" but still you've managed to do something like commit yourself in a relationship over a long period of time and that's something I haven't done.  Nor have I come close to one in a really long time.

I know I'm coming across as bitter but I've recently had an experience that certainly left a bitter taste in my mouth.  I met a guy online.   It had been quite sometime since I'd felt this excited over meeting anyone.  We did the fast and furious texting, the picture exchange went well, he looked really great on paper.  And that's all it was...good on paper.  Sure enough we met, spent a really great (I thought) afternoon and evening together and before he had even shut the door behind me he already knew he was never going to see me again.  

The fade began immediately.  He texted "OK, GN" in response to the "I got home safe" text. Then at work the next day we were both extremely busy..no surprise there.  I quite simply don't have time to look at my phone during the day anymore either.  But when I said "hi" I got crickets for days . OK so he hit it and quit it.  I'm no stranger to the strategy and ashamedly have used it myself  But this one hurt.  I felt so used and yeah bitter.  Somehow this guy got in and I'm more angry at myself than at him.

(An aside here...as a favor for friend Rob who's asked for a few details about the actual hook up. I met him on a site where conversations tend to get to the sexy flirty stage faster than say Match or E-Harmony.  Fingers and clothes were flying across the screen very quickly and very soon those naughty pics were exchanged.  We sexted for hours so much so I wore him out...he didn't wake up until 1pm the next day!!!  And that was just the virtual sex!!!  After he did wake up I was invited down to watch "football" (soccer of course...guy is an ex-pat Brit) and I got on the road.  For once I wasn't nervous...I had such a good feeling about this guy!!  We met at the bar and had a few drinks, enjoying the game, laughing and flirting, and hands roaming a little.  Moved onto dinner and did a little cruise about town before heading to his place.

The makeout session on the sofa was brief but hot and nipples were pinched and sucked and bulges rubbed through clothing and I was being pushed to my knees in front of him and asked to perform one of my natural talents (wink, wink) pretty quickly.  This guy was hard!!!  Pretty soon I was pushed to my back and we were fucking like crazy.  (Another aside...I think I finally managed to figure out woman on top!)  As you can imagine it was over pretty quickly and we were a sweaty pool on the carpet before we knew it.  Not too shabby for the first time and I was already anticipating a hot summer of steamy sex.....)

Well yeah, you already know how that turned out.  I know I've wandered into TL:DR territory here but I just needed to get this rant out.  "This is just a temporary glitch", "don't let it get you down", "it's not you it's him" have already been uttered over and over (thanks Rob for hearing me out yet again!) I've got a ways to go yet to get my head right again and this post is part of it.

Please, please any young or not-so-young guys (if anyone still reads here) who are online or meeting ladies...DON'T BE THIS GUY!!  If you want to know why women are cray cray---it's this type of behavior from men that we see Every.Single.Day.  With the nature of online dating and just the technology that's available now, it's all too easy to forget that a pic and words on a screen have a real live breathing human being on the other side.
 
My goal by going on the site wasn't to find just a hook-up.  I just wanted to find someone to go out with so I'm not stuck on the sofa this summer watching Big Bang reruns every Saturday night!  I thought this guy could be it .  He looked like fun and we had a blast texting.  I did finally hear from him this week: the ex creating drama, yadda yadda, didn't mean to hurt you blah blah all the excuses (and I'm sure they are valid to him). But we all know the truth: if you want to be with someone, you find a way. My response to him: Noted and understood, get your shit together and give me a call maybe, otherwise have a nice life.


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On a more personal note: I'VE MISSED YOU ALL SO MUCH!!  I hate that I don't have time to write or hardly read anymore.  But on certain weekends I have time for an orgy (sometimes literally...lol) of reading all your wonderful blogs.  Thankfully some of you are around and still IM me on occasion so I haven't quite fell out of touch.

As stated work is going well.  It is incredibly busy and stressful lately, however.  How do we all work so damn hard and still just have SO much to do is just beyond me!  But redemption is nigh!  As of this day next week my ass and toes will be planted in the sand with a drink firmly in hand!  My living arrangements haven't changed although I'm trying desperately and a serious search will begin when I get back from the beach.

As for any other adventures beyond the above--there have been a few.  Alan (1st AM guy) is still around.  I still chat with the WV Guy.  And then there's Rob...we still text and talk although not nearly as frequently as we used to...but we have future plans that could lead to some really excellent shenanigans.  :)  We'll just have to wait and see!!!!  I hope everyone is well and I hope you are having an excellent summer!


Monday, August 3, 2015

Roller Coaster

Once again I seem to have taken a longer than usual hiatus from writing.  I’d truly love to write more but as I’ve previously stated “work, eat, sleep and repeat” is rather dull. 

Since I began writing it seems I’ve been out of work more than I’ve been “on the job.”  I’m currently at my 4th—YES! 4TH!!!—job in the very short time of this blog’s existence.   This has happened through no fault of my own.  It is just a consequence of living where I do.  When you have no job, there is of course a tightening of the purse strings.  That leads to fewer opportunities to get out and about. 

Despite the periods of unemployment I have had a few adventures.  I continue to see “WV Guy” and although long distance we “talk” in some fashion almost every day.  This is my main relationship lately and it has been good in spite of the distance.  I did travel to his area earlier in the year and we had a great time together.  We even managed to get in some hiking after all the “hiking” J we were doing.  His area is absolutely beautiful country and there are lots of outdoorsy, fun things to do. 

Of course, I’m still me and I still have the occasional hook-up.  Most often with Alan—the first guy I met on AM.  He is always good to get in touch when he is traveling nearby.   And Rob posted about a little adventure we had earlier this year.  Since things have been well with WV Guy I don’t frequent many dating sites anymore.  Although I did check in on AM recently—and it just happened to be the night before The Hack was announced.  DOH!

From reading various forums online about it, it seems the initial panic may have been unfounded.  Fears seem to have calmed a bit on the “prowlers” sites as time has passed and no more additional information has been released.  Of course, there’s always a chance that will change and it’s something we in “the game” should be mindful of (“deny, deny, deny!”).  I wasn’t incredibly worried about being “outed” although it definitely got my attention and sent me running off to my tablet to read all about it.  Just a little reminder to be even more vigilant of protecting yourself online—no matter if you’re prowling or not. 


So this is just a little update post and me rambling on.  I hope to be taking a few trips at the end of the summer and I’m very much looking forward to getting away.  I’m still reading and following all your wonderful blogs although I’m not commenting as much.  I’m down to just my tablet at the house and it doesn’t make it easy for anything other than reading or playing games from what I’ve seen.  So I hope all you wonderful people are having a great, fun summer!!!  Stay Cool!!  

Thursday, February 12, 2015

FFF-2/13/2015--The Un-Valentine

Required Phrase - "And then my Crazy Ex......."
Word Limit - 2 short chapters of 230 each
Forbidden Phrase - Burned
Bonus Words if someone ends up dead.
Extra Credit if you fictionaliz a real world story.

And remember, rules were made to be broken







The signs began popping up all over town.  A red heart with the diagonal stripe through it.  The ultimate Un-Valentine's Day message.  No one understood the importance of the message that was about to be delivered.  

Thankfully the proprietors of all the sporting goods stores in town chalked up the bow and arrow sales to the popularity of The Hunger Games.  The Team met every Thursday night for practice, preparation and planning.  Finally it was time to set the plan in action.  Each of the conspirators had their targets and knew their current whereabouts.  This Friday the 13th will be very unlucky indeed.

As night fell the 2-person teams moved into position.  The first to go down is Charlene's bastard husband, Rick the Dick.  He was always so jealous yet Charlene couldn't go out, kept a spotless home, never gave her a dime.  Of course that didn't stop him from waving his dick at every woman in town.  He went down fast outside the bar with an arrow straight through his heart.  The tag with the heart seen all over town floated from the end of the arrow.  

The next target was Phillip--a classic abuser.  Joni won't be "falling down" anymore.  Then Justin the "Artist" whose only "work of art" was draining Macey's bank accounts, pushing her credit cards to their limits and drinking her beer and emptying the pantry while he "worked" on his novel.  One after one deadbeats fell all over town.  All with arrows piercing their black hearts.  

The Team regrouped at their hideaway deep in the woods.  Their leader, Ben, gathered all the ladies in front of him.  

"Excellent work ladies.  All the targets were taken down at precisely the same time.  Each of you were in place and all of your alibis should back up each other.  This was the best coordinated attack I've ever seen executed...". Suddenly his voice faded as he realized one team member hadn't made it back.  Where was Jenna?  

His eyes scanned the path looking into the darkness.  He missed the whoosh of the arrow as it flew out of the woods straight into his heart.  As he lay gasping for his last breath, Jenna stood above him.  

" I waited for five long years for you to propose.  It was always some excuse.  Yes, we had plenty of time.  I suppose I should have known after all the correct response when someone says 'I love you' ISN'T 'Thank you'.  

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I apologize for the error in the picture above.  These days I have to post from my tablet and after working for 45 minutes to fix it, I just left it.  I must say it feels good to be back participating in FFF again after a long hiatus.  I hit a dry spell with my writing and not much has been going on lately.  I'm once again looking for work, I am still talking with the WV guy and that is going well although our planned Valentine's meeting has been postponed.  I hope you all have a wonderful Valentine's Day!  Please check out the other entries at Advisor's place.  

P.S.  I just realized I forgot the required phrase.  Oh well as Ad says rules are meant to be broken.  Happy FFFriday!





Thursday, January 1, 2015

Resolve

OK I don't make resolutions usually but I do resolve to be a better blogger this year.  My NYE kind of sucked actually.  I fucked up with the guy I've been "seeing."  It's in quotes because how can you see him when it's long distance.  Way to go me!   Way to start off the new year--by being bitchy and effing things up.  

I haven't written much lately.  I'm currently in the midst of yet another dry spell.  It's been a year filled with them.  Although there were some pretty good highlights too.  Interacting with other bloggers and the few remaining readers here has always been the biggest reason I write.  I miss the dialogue.  

I'm without a computer at home which is a big reason for the low production lately.  (Please excuse the typos...I have to write from my tablet and I can't see what I'm typing...very frustrating.).   I did want to drop in and say I've missed you all and that I wish you well and best wishes for the new year.  

I'm sure things will work out one way or the other with the long distance guy.  Either way whether we stay together or not.  That's the great thing about New Year's--it's a fresh start filled with potential.  Again Happy 2015 to you all.  

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Thank You



Thank you to all who served.  I know not one of you would dare call yourselves a hero but that's OK.  I call you hero.  And to "my" vet a very Happy Veterans Day.  I hope you enjoy your day off.  You deserve it.

Sunday, October 19, 2014

I'm Still Here!

I'm still here!  Sorry for the little blogging hiatus but I just needed to recharge for a bit.  There really wasn't a lot going on for awhile and then September hit and there was lots going on.  I did some traveling which was nice (although 5 hours in a car with two kids made me feel compassion for my parents!  Sorry Mom and Dad!)  There have been a few changes.  I have yet another new job as of last week.  It was necessary for various reasons.  Anyway it's done and things are better.

One of the highlights of the month was the weekend of my high school reunion--there's NO WAY it's been 25 years!!  I invited a friend to town to go with me.  He arrived Friday night and I didn't get to meet him until late.  It was worth the wait.  He came downstairs and met me in the parking lot and as soon as we got to the room I was in his arms.  We spent the entire weekend together--practically the whole time in bed.  We did go to the dinner Saturday night but I wound up blowing off all the other reunion activities.  There was something else to blow.  ;)  It had been quite awhile since I've had a session like that but I so needed it.

It's been a few years since I was in a relationship with someone full-time and I forgot how wonderful it is just to touch someone and be touched.  The sex was pretty great--don't get me wrong.  Just being held after and lying in his arms as he stroked my back is what makes me smile when I think of that weekend.  To look at him, I never would have guessed he was such a cuddler!  Even watching football he pulled me down on the sofa and wrapped his arms around me.  That quickly led to us jumping back in bed.  All in all it was a wonderful weekend and I was delightfully sore on Monday morning.

I'm not sure where this is going since it is a long distance "relationship."  The internet and all the technology makes covering the distance a lot more convenient, of course.  We call or text or IM every night.  We even have certain TV shows that are "ours" that we watch together.  The distance isn't too great and I'm hoping to spend some more time with him for my birthday in a few weeks.  Could I be seeing the end of my "prowling" days?

Probably not since last night I drunk-texted my ex.  WTF is WRONG with me?!?!?!?  Can somebody just shoot me, please!  My only excuse is that I was lonely.  Fortunately as I re-read this morning there was nothing too cringeworthy--nor even suggestive (I know right!).  Whew!   BUT  I don't think I will ever get over my affinity for the Garden State men.  There's just something about them.

In other news, I seem to have got my act together on the "Getting In Shape" plan.  I've dropped 18 lbs!! Just in time for jean season.  :)  Only a few more pounds before my goal date.

To my friends in the blogosphere, it's good to be back.  Missed yall.

Thursday, September 11, 2014

I Will NEVER Forget



I. WILL.NEVER.FORGET.

Thank you to all who served.  I know you don't think you're heroes.  I KNOW you are.  My heroes are the ones who do what I can't.  They are nurses, doctors, soldiers, firemen, policemen, teachers.  For that,  I thank you all.  To all those who lost someone on 9/11, God bless you.  Please don't ever forget.